Zbogom Raiffeissen

Bio sam u prvim redovima kada ste došli da vas dočekam. Ne samo da sam otvorio svoj privatni račun, nego sam otvorio i sve račune za firmu kod vas. Čak sam i zaposlene maltretirao ubeđujući ih da ste najbolji.

Prvo ste počeli da me prodajete. Moje podatke, date vama, ustupili ste nekoj call centar firmi… I ovi su mi dosađivali. Sve dok im moj advokat jednog dana nije poslao pismo. Ostao sam verovatno crvenim slovima upisan – NE ZVATI! LUDAK!

I tako je naša veza trajala kao mnoge. Zbog navike.

Zbog stalnih gužvi izbegavao sam da uopšte ulazim u vase poslovnice. Zbilja samo kad sam morao. Kao onomad kada su mi kartice istekle, ja nisam ni pogledao, a vama nije palo na pamet da mi pošaljete SMS na onaj broj koji ste zajedno sa mojim imenom, adresom i JMBG-om ustupili nekom call centru. Srećom AmEx se postarao da ne ostanem da perem suđe…

A ovog meseca je došao konačni kraj.

Svi znate, pa i vi u banci po mojim izvodima, koliko putujem. Ne volim na put da nosim mnogo novca – mahom koristim kartice. AmEx i Diners su osnov a na njih je pridodata Visa electron. Dobio sam od vas (istine radi – nisam tražio) i Master i Visu. Nisam ih puno koristio ali ste mi redovno uzimali pare ‘za održavanje’. Nosao sam ih – za ne daj Bože.

Početkom jula sam shvatio da mi ipak trebaju. Za kupovinu karata kod Air Serbia koja samo sa njima radi… I tu počinje naš definitivni kraj.

Moj limit je na Masteru 45k dinara. Dovoljan za ono što meni treba. Kupio sam pošetkom jula kartu – 22k. Kupio sam neki parfem i cigare na free šopu. Platio sam ručak… Sve u svemu 41,5 k. Kako sam znao da će mi Master opet trebati, odmah po povratku sa puta sam došao kod vas i uplatio 36k dinara. Računam da mi je limit 39.5k. I tu se zeznem

Juče pokušam da kupim kartu sa vašim Masterom. Air Serbia me 6 puta odbije… Dobro nekom bi bilo dovoljno 2 puta ali ja sam uporan čovek. Sednem u auto po najvećoj vrućini, oko 14.00, i dođem kod vas u poslovnicu. Nije bitno koju za ovu priču jer bi mi se u svakoj desilo isto…

Dobar dan – Dobar dan. Šta je sa mojim Masterom. Kaže mi ljubazna službenica: pa vama je ostalo 3.5 k dinara. Ja: Nemoguće, uplatio sam prošle nedelje 36k. Da li je prošla uplata… Ona: Naravno gospodine, ali znate, politika banke da vam se te pare računaju tek sa sledećim izvodom. Mislim se, nisi dobro čuo… Ponovo pitam za uplatu… Ona mi objašnjava da je uplata prošla, ali da tim parama mogu da raspolažem tek kad prođe sledeći izvod. Krajem jula. Ništa mi nije jasno. Blokada. Na računu imam 39.5k ali mogu da koristim samo 3.5k dok ne prođe sledeći izvod. Pitam je, dobrano besan, da li čuje sebe šta priča. Kaže: da, pomalo nesigurno, ali kao automat na call centru dodaje: politika banke… Ulažem poslednji napor da doprem do birokratskog mozga, tonom koji je privukao pažnju obezbeđenja. Ne. Politika banke.

I onda, kako to često radim – odluka u trenutku. Molim vas da odmah zatvorim sve kartice, i sve tekuće račune. Molim vas za dokumenta kako da zatvorim sve račune firme. Dok ona zbunjeno zove šeficu, koja hitro dolazi i objašnjava mi da je to politika banke, vadim lap top i pred njima sav novac koji imam na firminom računu prebacujem u drugu banku.

Sada sam u postupku konačnog odlaska od vas. Znam da mi nećete pomoći da se lako rastanemo. Svi trikovi znani kao FT1P biće upotrebljeni.

No ja sam uporan čovek. Ne uporan – BANDOGLAV, kako bi rekla moja baba Rosa. Proverite kod ovih koji me znaju. Legende kruže o mojoj upornosti.   

A Master card? Setio sam se da sam, kada sam početkom juna obnavljao ugovor sa Telenorom izvadio i njihov. Aktivirao sam ga i jutros sam kupio kartu… Dok me i oni ne iznevere…

About campaign

Through years of managing campaigns, I've learned a few truisms along the way.  I created none of these, but I swear by these seven rules and have not lost a campaign since adopting them.

1. It's not what you say.  It's what you're talking about

All campaigns are helped or hurt by certain issues. Your candidate may have the greatest answers on education, but if education is an issue that helps your opponent more than you, you're fighting a losing battle even bringing it up.  Start your campaign by defining which issues help your candidate, and don't talk about anything else.

The key is to make the race "about" one of your key issues.  List issues for your candidate and issues for your opponent.  If your race becomes about one of your opponent's issues, you lose.

2. Issues only matter if they define your candidate

Most voter polls show a great affinity for issues, but issues aren't an end in themselves.  Few votes actually turn on one issue. What voters mean by "voting on issues" is that they use the issues in a campaign to determine the character of a candidate.  If your candidate's issues can't be connected together and articulated in a theme, change them until you can.  You must give a clear, consistent and favorable definition of who your candidate is. People want to vote for candidates like themselves, and can forgive an issue difference here and there if the theme represents values similar to the voters.

3. Make them fight for their base

If someone aligned with your opponent is running in a simultaneous race nearby, find an issue that they disagree on and push it.  If not, do the same with positions contrary to his supporters. Chances are, your opponent doesn't want a lead story about how he is out of touch with his own side, and it reminds his donors and voters that your opponent isn't always on their side, either.  Make him waste time and money shoring up people in his base while you take the middle.

4. Better to say the same thing ten times then to say ten things once

Nothing frustrates a candidate more than giving the same answer a thousandth time, except maybe losing the race, which he most surely will if he doesn't.  When the candidate is sick of saying it, that's when people are beginning to listen to it.  Many times, campaigns are months of rehearsal for a week of performance.  Stick to your message no matter how boring it is for a candidate who loves the thought of knowing everything about everything.   It'll pay off when it counts.

Tie every Q&A to your general theme, and from there back to one of your key issues.  If a question is not in your candidate's key areas, answer it briefly - very briefly - and bridge back to your themes and a key issue of yours.  You can't articulate your theme too often.

5. Negative should not mean angry

Reagan was a master.  You can say very negative things with a smile and a shake of the head and not appear negative.  When voters say they hate negative politics, what they mean is they hate angry politics.  If your tone is positive and your look is upbeat, you can say things as negative as you want and voters will chuckle with you, and hate your opponent for being angry about it.

6. Never campaign to your base

Especially with paid media.  They'll turn out.  They'll vote for you.  They aren't going to switch parties because of your race.  I do not mean ignore them.  Invite them to your rallies.  Call them for advice.  Ask them to spend a day campaigning with your candidate.  But don't spend a dime of paid media reaching them or promoting issues mainly for their benefit.  Go for the middle, or make a stab at the opponent's base instead.

7. The kitchen table conversation

My test for any key campaign issue.  Do families discuss this at the kitchen table?  If not, don't run on it.  Your candidate may have a passion for realigning the bus routes downtown, but if a majority of voters don't care about it in their lives, they aren't going to begin caring during your campaign.  A campaign's job is not to educate voters about things they should care about, or to reach out to people who never voted and turn them into activists. A campaign's job is to reflect and address the concerns that voters already have.